her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
