I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Girls should come with a carfax report
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
