i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
