a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
