the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
