hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I am naked and annoyed.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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