i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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