I think I just saw someone hide a body.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
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