Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
