Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
