I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
