Only a mothe r could love this liver
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
