We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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