You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Randomize
