Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
