Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize
