She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Randomize
