Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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