I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
