Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Randomize
