found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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