How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
BRING THE BAGELS
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
