You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
