I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
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