just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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