quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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