I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
