i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
