Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
