I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize