Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
