just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
