everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
