There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
