I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I'd cum for enchiladas.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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