I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize