I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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