Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
