I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
