how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
