i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
