It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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