First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
