He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I believe in your delicious
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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