Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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