Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize