porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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