i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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