What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
