how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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